King of the Hill | season 9 episode 23 | Simpsons World on FXX

Simpsons World Account (previously your FX Account) Log In

view profile ( )

Log Out

To watch full episodes,
you must sign in

Sign Out

Access your Simpsons World settings.

Head over to FXNOW to access full episodes,
movies, and unique original content from 3 channels
- FX, FXX, and FXM.

Go To

Extras

x

00:34

(Sky: ext. sky - day)

00:34

McBain: McBain to base. Under attack by Commie Nazis.

00:48

McBain: (AS HE WALKS TO REAR OF PLANE) They won't stop me from delivering these UNICEF pennies.

00:57

McBain: Go, pennies! Help the puny children who need you.

01:01

(Simpson Home: int. Simpson house - living room - continuous)

01:01

Bart Simpson: Wowwww! McBain has really buffed up. You could grate cheese on those abs.

01:06

Homer Simpson: Yeah, but can he do this?

Bart Simpson: (SHUDDER)

01:23

Commie Nazi: (GASP, THROWING UP HANDS) I surrender!

01:24

McBain: Not so fast.

01:29

Marge Simpson: That's what I call break-neck speed. (LAUGH)

01:33

Bart Simpson: (GRIMLY) Mom, a man just died.

01:37

Marge Simpson: (ANNOYED GRUMBLE) Anyway, it's time for the church picnic.

01:39

Homer Simpson: (GETTING UP) What? They had a picnic last week.

01:42

Marge Simpson: No they didn't. You just brought a bucket of chicken to church.

01:46

Homer Simpson: If God didn't want us to eat in church, he would have made gluttony a sin.

02:05

(Park: ext. park - day - a little later)

02:05

Lou: Hey!

02:05

Chief Wiggum: (SPUTTERS, THEN CALLS OUT) Ah, the joke's on you. We borrowed that jar from your table. So you just shot your own mustard!

02:12

Legs: (JOE PESCI VOICE) Aw nuts!

02:14

Homer Simpson: Ooo, still plenty of parking.

02:18

Rev. Timothy Lovejoy: (FRIENDLY) Nice to see you, Homer.

02:20

Homer Simpson: Yeah, out of the way, whoever you are. You're blocking the food.

02:30

(Burns's Limo: int. burns' limo - continuous)

02:30

C. Montgomery Burns: Ah, there's nothing like a good old-fashioned picnic. How's my kite doing, Smithers?

02:35

Waylon Smithers: Oh-ho, it's, uh, soaring majestically, sir.

02:38

Ralph Wiggum: You're it!

02:40

C. Montgomery Burns: We'll see about that. After him, Smithers!

02:44

Ralph Wiggum: (SCREAM) You're not it.

02:45

(Park: ext. park - hilly, rocky area - continuous)

02:45

Bart Simpson: Gentlemen, the game is capture the flag. Rod, ladies pick first.

02:51

Rod Flanders: Okay, I choose... Todd.

02:55

Milhouse Van Houten: Oh! Oh! Oh! Bart! Bart! Over here! O-over here!

02:59

Bart Simpson: Um... I'll take... Nelson.

03:05

Milhouse Van Houten: Saving the best for last, huh, Bart?

03:07

Bart Simpson: Yeah, that must be it.

03:08

Rod Flanders: I pick my Dad. Do you want to play capture the flag, Daddy?

03:14

Ned Flanders: Heh. (UNSURE) Sports on a Sunday? Hm. I'd better check with Reverend--

03:18

Rev. Timothy Lovejoy: (INTERRUPTING) Oh, play the damn game, Ned.

03:20

Bart Simpson: Yeah, well, if you get a grown-up, then so do we. I pick my Dad.

03:25

Nelson Muntz: Him?!

03:26

Bart Simpson: (CROSSING TO HOMER) Oh, you'd be surprised. He gets pretty competitive when he's drinking. C'mon, Dad. We're playing Capture the Flag!

03:33

Homer Simpson: Sorry, son, Daddy's down for the day. Why don't you go capture me some more potato salad?

03:37

Bart Simpson: But Rod picked his Dad. It's a matter of family honor.

03:41

Homer Simpson: Flanders is playing? Why didn't you say so?

03:49

Comic Book Guy: (SIGHS) Oh, it appears I will have to find a new Fortress of Solitude.

03:58

Bart Simpson: Okay, Dad, they've got our flag guarded pretty good...

04:00

Homer Simpson: I agree. Let's surrender.

04:02

Bart Simpson: (WHISPERING) No, wait. I have a plan. But I'll need your underpants.

04:05

Homer Simpson: Hmm... All right, but don't lose them. They're my only pair.

04:09

(FLAG ZONE: ext. flag zone - a minute later)

04:09

Bart Simpson: I got it! I got the flag!

04:12

Other Team: (AMID CHATTER) Get him!

04:16

Homer Simpson: (SNEAKY CHUCKLE) Stupid kids...

04:22

Milhouse Van Houten: This isn't the flag! It looks more like... Ewww!

04:29

Bart Simpson: (SLY CHUCKLE) Suckers! Go Dad!

04:42

Bart Simpson: Come on, Dad! Just a few more feet! Show 'em what you got!

04:49

Kids: Tag tag tag tag tag!

04:52

Homer Simpson: (GASPING) Time out... t... time out...

04:55

Nelson Muntz: (CONCERNED) Oh, I don't think he can get up. (THEN) Let's egg him!

05:07

Homer Simpson: (WHIMPERING SOUNDS) Oh, stop it!

05:09

Milhouse Van Houten: Hey, h-he's trying to turn over.

05:24

(Simpson Home: ext. simpson house - night - establishing)

05:24

Homer Simpson: I've never seen Bart so ashamed of me.

05:29

Homer Simpson: (SADLY) Oh, Marge. How could you let me let myself go like this?

05:33

Marge Simpson: Me? I'm not the one who puts butter in your coffee.

05:36

Homer Simpson: Yeah, well, I've humiliated my son for the last time. I'm going to get into shape.

05:41

Marge Simpson: (HEARD IT BEFORE) Whatever you say, sweetie.

05:43

Homer Simpson: No, I mean it. I'm really serious this time.

05:46

Marge Simpson: Okay, honey. Okay. I'll start taking in all your slacks. (QUIET LAUGHTER)

Homer Simpson: (DECISIVE GRUNT)

06:07

Homer Simpson: (TO DOG) Okay, boy, I want you to keep this exercise thing under your hat. That way I won't be embarrassed if I fail.

Santa's Little Helper: (BARKS ONCE)

Snowball II: (MEOW)

06:15

Homer Simpson: Oh, great. Now the cat knows.

06:17

Homer Simpson: (DEEP BREATH) Okay, here we go...

Homer Simpson: (DEFEATED GROAN)

06:34

Homer Simpson: (SUCKING IN GUT) Look, son. Daddy got in shape. E--

06:40

Homer Simpson: (DISAPPOINTED GROAN) I've got to keep trying! (THEN) Or I could just move that picture. (DETERMINED) No! The picture looked good where it was. (TO DOG) Boy, drag me back outside.

07:04

(Springfield Streets: ext. springfield streets - night)

Homer Simpson: (PAINED NOISES)

Homer Simpson: (LOUDER PAINED NOISES)

07:04

(Kwik-E-Mart: Int. Kwik-e-mart - two a.m.)

Homer Simpson: (CLEARS THROAT)

07:04

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: So what will it be, Mr. Simpson? Your usual bucket of ice cream covered with miniature pies?

07:19

Homer Simpson: Uhh... (LOOKING AROUND) Don't you have anything healthy here?

07:22

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Oh, well, we have some low-salt candy bars and some reduced-fat soda. And our beef jerky is now nearly rectum-free.

07:31

Homer Simpson: Hey, these Power Sauce bars look pretty healthy.

07:34

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Oh yes, that is a new item. No bar contains more applesauce.

07:38

Homer Simpson: (READING LABEL) Hmm... A bushel of apples packed in each bar, plus a secret ingredient that unleashes the awesome power of apples. Wow.

07:53

(Streets: Ext. streets - three a.m.)

07:53

Homer Simpson: (RHYMES WITH "DIME") "Gym?" What's a "Gym?"

07:58

(Gym: Int. gym - a minute later)

07:58

Homer Simpson: Ohhh... (CHUCKLES, STILL RHYMES WITH "DIME") a gym.

08:06

Homer Simpson: Ow! Ow! Ow! Boy, am I feeling this. Ow! Oh, my head's gonna be sore in the morning. Ow!

08:14

Muscular Man: Excuse me. You're doing this station all backwards. Let me show you how to do it like a man.

08:21

Homer Simpson: (GASP) Ranier Wolfcastle! Oh, I love your movies and your Power Sauce bars and your taut, rippling--

08:26

Rainier Wolfcastle: Hey, hey, hey. That's enough. Now step over to the abdominator and I will shout slogans at you.

08:35

Rainier Wolfcastle: (GROWING FRENZY) Push! Harder! Go past the max! Reach over the top! Master your ass!

08:44

Homer Simpson: Wow, Wolfie. Two months ago I didn't know what the word "dumbbell" meant. This place is great.

08:54

Rainier Wolfcastle: Um-hm.

08:54

(Simpson Home: Int. Simpson house - bedroom - day)

08:54

Homer Simpson: (MACHO VOICE) Hello, handsome. Nice muscles. Care for a rubdown? (NORMAL VOICE) Oh-ho, well, I'm flattered, but spoken for. Oh, what the heck, give me your number.

09:06

Lisa Simpson: Dad, what have you done to your stomach?

09:08

Bart Simpson: And your chest!

09:09

Marge Simpson: And your shirt!

09:11

Homer Simpson: I have been working out secretly at night. And look at me now!

09:16

Marge Simpson: (IMPRESSED) Oh my goodness gracious!

09:19

Homer Simpson: Heh, heh, heh. Go ahead. Try and grab some flab. Go on. Ju--

09:22

Homer Simpson: (ANNOYED) No, not there.

09:24

Homer Simpson: Not there either. Over here.

09:25

Lisa Simpson: (ANNOUNCING) I've got some!

09:27

Homer Simpson: No, here. Try my foot. No, not that foot. Just feel my biceps.

Marge Simpson: (IMPRESSED NOISES)

09:32

Bart Simpson: Whoaa...

09:34

Homer Simpson: Well, whaddaya think of your old man now, son?

Bart Simpson: (FRIGHTENED NOISE)

09:39

Homer Simpson: Damn right.

09:45

Homer Simpson: How can you put that filth into your bodies?

09:48

Marge Simpson: (TO BART AND LISA) My casserole is not filth. Eat it.

09:52

Homer Simpson: Look at you people. Bart's a tub, Lisa's weak as a little girl, and Maggie doesn't seem to be growing at all.

09:59

Marge Simpson: Now that's just non--

10:00

Homer Simpson: You too, Marge. If you toned up a little, you'd probably get a lot more action. (WINKS, CLICKING NOISE)

10:05

Marge Simpson: Homer, stop insulting us and eat your filth. Food. I mean, food.

10:09

Homer Simpson: Sorry, I only eat food in bar form. When you concentrate food, you unleash its awesome power, I'm told. That's why I'm compressing five pounds of spaghetti into one handy mouth-sized bar.

10:25

Homer Simpson: Hm.

10:29

Homer Simpson: (CALMLY) Hospital, please.

10:33

(Gym: Int. gym - next day)

10:33

Rainier Wolfcastle: Homer, please remember to wipe your sweat off that machine. I got a terrible rash yesterday.

10:39

Bart Simpson: (IMPRESSED) You know Rainier Wolfcastle?

10:41

Homer Simpson: Yeah, he helped me blast through the burn and ride the zone.

10:46

Brad: Yo, yo, Rainier, my man! How ya doin'? I thought you'd be here, pumping those guns.

10:51

Neil: We've come up with a killer promotion for Power Sauce bars. Picture this: You...

10:56

Rainier Wolfcastle: I love it.

10:57

Neil: ...climb the highest mountain in Springfield...

11:00

Brad: The Murderhorn.

11:01

Rainier Wolfcastle: Are you crazy? That's suicide.

11:03

Neil: Oh, sure, for experienced mountain climbers. But you're a movie star. And you'll have the Power Sauce edge.

11:10

Rainier Wolfcastle: Not for all the applesauce in Glueckenschlaben.

11:15

Bart Simpson: (PROUDLY) My Dad could do it!

11:17

Bart Simpson: He eats fifty dollars' worth of Power Sauce bars a day.

11:21

Homer Simpson: (MANTRA) Overshoot the extreme, max the envelope, and so on.

11:24

Neil: Wow, he's really been paying attention to our slogans. Uh, Brad -- a word.

11:29

Neil: New angle: Joe Schlub eats Power Sauce bar -- becomes World's Mightiest Man.

11:34

Brad: It's believable. That's what I like about it.

11:38

Neil: Hm. Congratulations, sir.

11:38

Homer Simpson: Huh?

11:40

Brad: You're gonna be the first man to climb the Murderhorn.

11:43

Homer Simpson: I am?

11:49

Neil: Uh, no, that's it over there.

11:54

Neil: Yeah, that's it. (GENTLY TURNING HOMER'S CHIN) Just to the right of the one you're looking at.

Homer Simpson: (WORRIED NOISE)

12:09

(Simpson Home: Int. Simpson house - living room - day)

12:09

Homer Simpson: Okay, mountain-climbing supplies: rope, ice axe, heart medicine...

12:14

Grampa Simpson: Son! Don't go up that mountain! You'll die up there! Just like I did!

12:20

Homer Simpson: You? Did?

12:21

Grampa Simpson: Sure, it was the winter of '28...

12:26

Grampa Simpson: The Butter Baby Flapjack company sponsored me and a fella named McAllister. We were almost to the top, when we ran low on supplies.

12:37

Grampa Simpson: Heroically, I gave him the last short stack.

12:45

Grampa Simpson: Then, that glory hog took all the supplies and headed for the top alone.

12:53

Grampa Simpson: I fell 8,000 feet onto a pile of jagged rocks. 'Course folks were tougher in those days. I was jitterbuggin' that very night. But that skunk McAllister was never seen again.

13:08

Homer Simpson: If you're trying to scare me, it won't work. I'm one hundred percent focused on my goal. (NOTICING) Hey, my hat has ear flaps! (LAUGHS)

13:16

(Mountain: EXT. MOUNTAIN - DAY)

13:16

(BASE OF THE MURDERHORN: Ext. base of The Murderhorn - continuous)

13:16

Brad: And when he reaches the top, Mr. Simpson, here, will plant this Power Sauce flag as an eternal symbol of man's contempt for nature. Wait -- is "contempt" the word I want here?

13:26

Brad: Homer, you're the world's greatest hero. Do you owe it all to Power Sauce?

13:32

Homer Simpson: That's right, Brad and Neil. I only eat Power Sauce -- the bar with Apple-saucicity. ("SAUCE-ISS-IT-EE")

13:37

Marge Simpson: Has anyone mentioned that Homer doesn't know anything about mountain climbing and that this is all crazy?

13:44

Neil: Well, yes, a number of people. But don't worry. We're sending two Sherpas along as guides.

Sherpa #1: (TO SHERPA #2, TRANSLATION TO COME)

Sherpa #2: (TRANSLATION TO COME)

13:53

Homer Simpson: Aww. Goodbye, everyone. Don't touch my stuff.

13:57

Bart Simpson: (CONCERNED) Dad, wait. You're not risking your life just to impress me, are you?

14:02

Homer Simpson: (ADMITTING) Well, yeah...

14:04

Bart Simpson: (QUICKLY) Oh, cool! Now get goin', chop-chop!

14:09

Brad: Remember our agreement. He can't fail.

14:21

(Mountain: Ext. mountain - later)

14:21

Homer Simpson: (TO SELF, WINDED) Oh, man, this is hard.

14:25

Bart Simpson: Uh, Dad?

14:26

Bart Simpson: Shouldn't you save a couple bottles for when you're a little higher?

14:31

Homer Simpson: Bart, this climb is the most difficult ordeal I have ever faced.

14:36

(Simpson Home: Ext. Simpson house - roof - continuous)

14:36

Bart Simpson: Don't get discouraged, Dad. Only four vertical miles to go.

Homer Simpson: (FROM A DISTANCE, ANNOYED GRUNT)

15:02

(Mountain: Ext. mountain - midnight)

15:02

Homer Simpson: Wow! Look how far I climbed! And I'm not even tired!

15:07

Homer Simpson: Wake up, you lazy Sherpas. We've got a mountain to climb!

Sherpa #1: (TRANSLATION TO COME)

Sherpa #2: (TRANSLATION TO COME)

15:19

Brad: This Power Sauce news break is brought to you by Power Sauce. Get sauced with Power Sauce. Neil?

15:25

Neil: Our top story: Homer Simpson has just Power Sauced his way past the halfway point of the Murderhorn.

15:33

Neil: Brad, could Homer have made it this far without the engineered nutrition of six kinds of apples?

15:38

Brad: No way, Neil. (RECEIVING BULLETIN) Oh, this just in: Power Sauce is amazing!

15:48

Homer Simpson: (WAKING-UP NOISES) Huh?... Wha ya?... (NOTICING ROPE) Hey! You guys are dragging me up the mountain.

15:57

Sherpa #1: Brad and Neil were quite insistent you not die.

16:00

Sherpa #2: (CONFESSING) Frankly we don't care.

16:01

Homer Simpson: So nobody believes I can do this, huh? Well, my son does. And I'm not gonna let him down. I'm going to climb this entire mountain on my own.

16:10

Sherpa #1: Then technically, shouldn't you go back down the mountain and start all over?

16:14

Homer Simpson: Shut up. You are so fired.

16:17

Sherpa #1: Woo hoo!

Sherpas: (JUBILANT WHOOPS)

16:22

Homer Simpson: Homer Simpson here. I've sent the Sherpas home and I'm heading for the top, solo.

16:27

(POWER SAUCE CORP.: Int. power sauce corp. - continuous)

16:27

Brad: Are you crazy? You'll never make it.

16:29

Homer Simpson: (THROUGH WALKIE-TALKIE) The hell I won't. You're forgetting I've got my Power Sauce bars.

16:34

Neil: Wake up, Homer! Those bars are just junk. They're made of apple cores and Chinese newspapers.

16:39

(Mountain: EXT. MOUNTAIN - continuous)

16:39

Homer Simpson: Hey, Deng Xiao-Ping died.

16:43

Neil: (THROUGH WALKIE-TALKIE) Homer, listen to me! Turn back now!

16:46

Homer Simpson: Forget it. I'll be at the top by noon. Over and out.

16:55

Brad: (FUNEREAL TONE) Homer Simpson -- defying all medical advice -- has switched to Power Sauce's arch-rival: the Vita-Peach Health Log. Doctors say he may not have the meganutrients needed to stave off death.

17:06

(Simpson Home: Int. Simpson house - living room - continuous)

17:06

Bart Simpson: (UPSET) Oh, Dad's gonna die and it's all my fault! (THEN) I really need a good talkin' to.

17:11

Marge Simpson: Don't worry, kids. Your father'll be okay, as long as he's with those Sherpas.

17:16

Lisa Simpson: Uh... Mom?

Marge Simpson: (WORRIED MURMUR)

17:36

(Mountain: EXT. MOUNTAIN - day - HOURS LATER)

17:36

Homer Simpson: (GRUNTING AND BREATHING HARD, THEN TO HIMSELF) Air's getting thin, but I'm gonna make it. (BEAT) Woo! Getting lightheaded... Good -- no heavy head to carry. Wait! I'll just take that escalator!

18:09

Homer Simpson: (SINGING) La la la la la la la la...

18:18

Homer Simpson: (SINGING) La la la la la la la la la...

Homer Simpson: (ANNOYED GRUNT)

18:33

Homer Simpson: Just a few feet more...

Homer Simpson: (CLIMBING NOISES)

18:46

Homer Simpson: (TOTALLY DRAINED) I did it! I made it all the way to... Aw, crap!

18:54

Homer Simpson: (DEFEATED) It just keeps going! (SOBS) I give up. You beat me, mountain!

19:07

(Cave: Int. cave - continuous)

19:07

Homer Simpson: (RELIEVED SIGH) At least I won't freeze to death.

Homer Simpson: (SHORT SCREAM)

19:15

Homer Simpson: (READING) "Last entry. I have mountaineered to the utmost, but the peak is unclimbable. Worse still, that treacherous skunk Abe Simpson stole my oxygen, and tried to eat my left arm."

19:20

Homer Simpson: (DISGUSTED) Ew, Dad. (READING) "Tell my beloved wife my last thoughts were of her, blinding and torturing Abe Simpson. Cheerio."

19:35

Homer Simpson: (SAD NOISE) My Dad's a disgrace, just like Bart's Dad. Me. (SOBS)

19:50

(Mountain: Ext. mountain - continuous)

19:50

Homer Simpson: This may not be the top, but it's as close as a Simpson's ever gonna get.

19:56

Homer Simpson: This is for you, son.

Homer Simpson: (SHEEPISH NOISE)

20:16

Homer Simpson: (GROWING EXCITEMENT) Hey. Wait a minute. I'm on the top. I actually did it. I climbed the unclimbable mountain! Bow down before me, everyone! For I am your KING!

20:33

(Base Of Mountain: Ext. base of mountain - a little later)

20:33

Lisa Simpson: (WORRIED) Family to Dad. Family to Dad. Come in, Dad!

20:37

Brad: Uh, I'm pretty sure he's dead, little girl. Here, have a Power Sauce bar. It's on the house.

20:42

Bart Simpson: Hey! Something's coming down the mountain! Fast!

20:45

Marge Simpson: Oh no, he fell! I can't look!

Homer Simpson: (APPROACHING SCREAM)

20:56

Homer Simpson: Hi.

20:57

Marge Simpson: Oh, Homie! You're alive!

21:00

Homer Simpson: Oh, Marge, I never thought you'd see me again.

21:03

Lisa Simpson: Where in the world did you find a sled on top of the-- (HORRIFIED SCREAM)

Onlookers: (REVOLTED SOUNDS)

21:10

Dr. Julius Hibbert: We're too late. He's dead. (NOTICING SOMETHING) A-- And it looks like someone tried to eat him.

21:17

Grampa Simpson: What are you looking at me for? You're all crazy! Crazy as--

21:25

Grampa Simpson: Okay, here's what I think happened...

21:31

Bart Simpson: Didja make it to the top, Dad? Huh? Didja?

21:33

Homer Simpson: (COYLY) Why don't you tell me, son? See any interesting flags up there?

21:39

Bart Simpson: All I see is a pole. Maybe the flag fell off.

21:42

Homer Simpson: Aw, dammit!

21:44

Bart Simpson: Forget about it, Homer. You made it to the top. You're the coolest Dad ever.

21:49

Homer Simpson: (HUGS BART) Thanks, Bart. That makes it all worthwhile.

21:53

Marge Simpson: Is that your wallet?

Homer Simpson: (ANNOYED GRUNT)

SEASON 9 EPISODE 23

King of the Hill

This episode is available in 4:3 & 16:9

|

Audio commentary available

After improving his physique, Homer attempts to climb a treacherous mountain. Presented by FXX. ...

CAST & CREW
Dan Castellaneta
Nancy Cartwright
Julie Kavner
Dan Castellaneta
Nancy Cartwright
Julie Kavner
Yeardley Smith
Harry Shearer

Producers
Mike Scully

DIRECTORS
Steven Dean Moore

WRITERS
John Swartzwelder

Read More +

CLIPS FROM THIS EPISODE

(5 Clips)

Expand

Close X

Clip From S9/E23

Powersauce
Clip From S9/E23

Powersauce

Homer works out and discovers Powersauce bars and an All Night Gym.
Clip From S9/E23

The Murderhorn
Clip From S9/E23

The Murderhorn

Bart volunteers Homer to climb a mountain for a Power Sauce promotion.
Clip From S9/E23

The Escalator
Clip From S9/E23

The Escalator

Homer has a hallucination while climbing the Murderhorn.
Clip From S9/E23

The New Dad in Town
Clip From S9/E23

The New Dad in Town

Homer shows off his new biceps.
Clip From S9/E23

Capture the Flag
Clip From S9/E23

Capture the Flag

Homer embarrasses Bart during a game of Capture the Flag.

You may also like...

S9/E9

Realty Bites

S9/E16

Dumbbell Indemnity

S9/E17

Lisa the Simpson

Something Random